I was born into a world of bullets

 

Manenberg on the Cape Flats. It is one of South Africa’s most notorious hotspots for gang violence. Scores of innocent bystanders get caught in the crossfire between rival gangs daily and I have experienced more than my fair share of bullets and stabbings. Even yesterday I saw a man being shot dead in front of my home.

“When I was 12 or 13 I watched a group of guys stabbing someone in his chest with a screwdriver. They didn’t stop till he dropped to the ground. I saw the terror and fear in the faces of the community who witnessed the stabbing, the man passed away in his mother’s arms that evening.

“As a child, I was interested in books, I guess it was because I was curious, but it was also a way to escape. During those years, I didn’t realise that my mom and dad had issues. My father was a substance abuser and his habit cost money. We often didn’t have food in the house as a result of my dad’s lifestyle. His addictions were being fed, whilst we were struggling.

“My father was in and out of prison for various crimes. He got involved with the wrong crowd – a gang of carjackers. At one point, they threatened him that if he didn’t take the wrap for crimes they were committing, they would kill my mother and his children. I only learnt about this after my dad had been in prison for a year.

“Although I didn’t have my dad around whilst growing up, I was lucky to have had great mentors at Christel House School over the 12 years that I was there. The educators offered me a secure and stable place during this critical time.

“Because of my dad’s stuff, my mom was the only parent in the house. She is a resilient woman, with sheer grit. She’s a server of people, helping in night shelters, guiding and nurturing others in spite of her home circumstances. My mom has been our rock and super-woman whilst growing up. She has somehow managed to give me what I needed, not what I wanted. This has been a valuable lesson for me. She has raised us to be free-spirited, loving and caring.

“Looking back over my life, I feel like my life has been one long online game – the king pulling the shots and the pawns running the rackets. My reality is that I live with gunshots – I go to sleep hearing them and am woken up in the night by them. Yesterday, when I was at the barber, there was a hit and run outside, then a full- on gun battle. It’s not the first time I’ve been in a crossfire. On Wednesday when I got off the taxi in Manenberg, I was caught in the crossfire – You can’t imagine the trauma I’ve become used to living with, as bullets have been an aspect of my life since childhood.

“Life on the Cape flats is not what people think it is. It’s 100 times worse. We live amongst murderers. When I wake up in the morning and go out, I pray to see the end of the day. Getting shot at my front gate is an everyday risk.

“I’ve lived through shootings and gangsterism for years – it’s a game for the gangsters. What I’ve noticed is that the gangsters focus on retaliation – by killing someone, they feel they have levelled the playing field. What they don’t seem to realise is that this causes revenge attacks, and so the fighting continues year after year. It’s become the norm and our community pays the price.

“I can see that people want change, but they aren’t ready for it. When the police get called, the parents of the children with the firearms shout at the police and defend their kids. They aren’t ready to accept the aid that people wants to give.

“So this has been the story of my life, fortunately, anchored by my mom and the stability of the school I attended. Life was tough but stable apart from 6 months of my matric year when I had to sleep on the couch at home because my sister had moved back home with her baby. In spite of living conditions at home and on the streets, I got a good matric and got a bursary to enrol at UWC for a B Com Financial Accounting degree.

“Two months into my 2nd semester in 2nd year, I applied to stay in res to escape the socio-economic conditions in Manenberg. I was accepted, but the admin at UWC had double-booked my room, so I had to stay at home again. It felt like my bursary fund manager at UWC was also overloaded and left me to struggle with finances and travel challenges.

“To make money for travelling to university, I used to sell instruments. It wasn’t a sustainable solution as the demand dried up and I didn’t have access to the right target market. Not being able to fund myself, and trying so hard to do something that would sustain me, I found it difficult to cope with my studies because I couldn’t always attend lectures and couldn’t afford to eat and travel. I had to drop out – but I continued looking for a new opportunity where I could grow.

“I started doing freelance audio engineering. Whilst I was doing this and looking for clients on Facebook, I saw the Life Choices Coding brochure. I applied at Life Choices Academy with my matric results and was invited to attend the boot-camp. I was 20 when I started the course and was fascinated by the languages I could learn. Coding stimulated me and made me realise how much I was able to learn. The problem-solving skills that I have developed during the training, have given me new energy in life.

“At Life Choices, we learnt how to turn walls into doors, to find ways to do things and not see them as obstacles. During the 6 months training, we also did life skills, an 8-week meditation course, which solidified my understanding of how critical it is to still my mind, and how to be at one with myself. The course takes a holistic approach, which has changed me in so many ways.

“On completion of the Coding Course, Life Choices places us in 6-month internships. I have been an intern at Semantica for 3 months now – what they have offered me and exposed me to, is more than I could ever have expected or asked for. More than I even knew existed out there. The environment is rich in encouragement and stimulus.

“Looking back over the past year, if it wasn’t for Life Choices, I honestly can’t imagine how I would have worked out my future – at the time I was demotivated and couldn’t energise myself. I feel as though I have been given the opportunity of a lifetime. As a Life Choices alumnus, I want to give back to upcoming coding students and become a mentor because I realise the critical importance of opportunity, mentoring and stimulus combined.

“For me, I feel that given that I’m still alive today, God still wants me to serve my purpose. I see myself making a difference in my community by forming a network of people who can be tapped into for resources that can nurture youth’s potential. I believe that the mind truly shapes your reality. The programme I want to start is to give kids life skills and guidance through mentors. I believe this will help kids find themselves and give them better opportunities in life, other than joining a gang.”

Curiosity and courage lead to great things

 

I am Mihlali Tomsana. Growing up, I was always the curious kid – the one who couldn’t resist taking apart every new toy just to see how it worked. My parents often joked that I was the reason we never had many toys around the house – they’d barely survive a day in my hands before I’d dismantle them in my quest for understanding.

 

This insatiable curiosity about the inner workings of things led me naturally towards the field of electronics. I saw the impact of electricity – and often its absence – on my community, and I yearned to make a difference. I wanted to understand load-shedding – to figure out how to stop it and to unravel the mysteries of electricity that affected our daily lives.

 

My educational journey took me through Cape Academy, in Constantia, for high school, followed by False Bay TVET College in Westlake. I was driven, determined, always running forward, but I didn’t yet know where my path would lead me.

 

Then, almost by chance, I stumbled upon Life Choices. It was like finding a hidden door that opened up a whole new world of possibilities. Before Life Choices, I had no idea what those blue things on people’s roofs were – solar panels were a complete mystery to me. But Life Choices introduced me to the world of solar energy, and suddenly, everything clicked into place.

 

They introduced me to a field that not only fed my curiosity about how things worked, but also offered a way to benefit not just my community, but the entire world. It was a perfect blend of my passion for understanding technology and my desire to make a positive impact, ‘killing two birds with one stone’. The realisation hit me hard – this was my calling.

 

Life Choices offered more than just technical knowledge. They understood that sometimes, an opportunity can present itself, but if your mindset isn’t ready, you might miss it entirely. That’s where the incredible support system at Life Choices came in.

 

Sessions with Marlene, Sis Queen, and Coach Matika, and others didn’t just equip me with skills and resources – they helped me develop the mindset to truly thrive. They taught me how to work effectively in a team, spreading out my resources and energy so I could run far, not just fast. They helped me learn to trust in myself, to silence the doubt that can sometimes hold us back.

 

The programme at Life Choices was comprehensive, covering everything from design and planning to procurement, installation, client relations, and contract management. It gave me a holistic understanding of the solar industry that proved invaluable when I entered the field.

 

What truly set the experience apart, though, was the quality of the lecturers. Life Choices had clearly put tremendous thought into selecting the right people to guide us. They brought in youthful, passionate experts who could break down the complexities of this fast-growing field in ways we could easily digest and apply. Their enthusiasm was contagious, making every class an engaging experience. For the first time in my life, I found myself looking forward to classes, even dreading Fridays because it meant two days without seeing our inspiring lecturers. Their ability to make learning both informative and enjoyable was a game-changer for me.

 

Now, I find myself working as a construction manager at Solar Electricity. It’s a role that challenges me every day, but thanks to the foundation laid by Life Choices, I feel equipped and confident. I’m not just applying technical skills – I’m using the soft skills they emphasized so strongly, building teams, communicating effectively, and setting out visions.

 

Looking to the future, I dream of the impact I can make in the field of sustainable energy. It might sound simple, but I want to help solve the energy problems facing our communities. I’ve seen firsthand how unreliable electricity affects people’s lives – my family, my neighbours, my peers. I want to be part of strengthening our power grid, ensuring that future generations won’t have to face the challenges we’ve endured.

 

My journey is far from over. I will still visit Life Choices when I can, seeking advice, sharing experiences, and continuously working to improve myself. They’ve shown me that learning is a lifelong process, and I’m excited to see where this path will lead me next.

 

As I reflect on my journey, I’m filled with gratitude – for the curiosity that has driven me, for the opportunities I’ve been given, and for the people at Life Choices who helped shape me into who I am today. They didn’t just teach me about solar panels; they taught me how to be a better version of myself in and outside of work. Life Choices truly lived up to its name, offering me choices that have changed my life for the better.

“I am my own hero!”

 

My name is Bahijah Abrahams, and I am 19 years old. At just four days old, I entered foster care, leaving behind a biological family mired in chaos, their lives overshadowed by the harsh realities of drugs and violence. My mother, entrenched in a life of crime, even contemplated selling me. Yet, against all odds, I was spared that fate and welcomed into a loving foster family that cared for me deeply.

 

As I grew, I faced horrors no child should endure. From ages eight to sixteen, I suffered abuse at the hands of a cousin. Those memories felt like buried secrets – locked away yet echoing within me. I often reflect on what Marlene, my counsellor at Life Choices, says: “You may not remember what happened to you, but your cells do.” And it’s true. Despite the love from my foster family, the scars from my past were constant reminders of where I came from.

 

My teenage years were marked by turmoil, filled with extreme emotional highs and lows. I battled self-destructive thoughts and reached a breaking point that led to hospitalisation, leaving me shaken. In the psychiatric ward, I witnessed the heartbreaking realities of mental health care – other kids stripped of their dignity, chained to beds, their cries reverberating in sterile halls. It was terrifying, but it ignited a fierce determination within me. I vowed to never return to that dark place – I was going to take control of my life.

 

“I’m my own hero,” I declared one day, and I meant it. I channelled my pain into purpose. By grade nine, though still a child, I began to grasp the power of resilience. I focus on my younger siblings, especially my 17-year-old sister. I refuse to let her fall into the same cycle of dysfunction that entangled our family. “You have so much potential,” I tell her. “You can break free from this!”

 

In my final year of high school, I discovered Life Choices. Initially, I thought it was just a place for pads and supplies, but I soon realised it was a community dedicated to helping people. That’s where I learned about Salesforce, and my world expanded. “I thought it was just call centre vibes,” I joked with friends, but I quickly became captivated by the world of business and data handling.

 

As I immersed myself in the Salesforce program, I began to flourish. The atmosphere buzzed with diverse personalities and ambitions, and for the first time, I felt like I truly belonged. “I love being myself here,” I told my new friends, and it was true. This space encourages me to express my authentic self, free from judgement. The business lessons I learned and the data handling skills I am learning are invaluable tools that I did not know would help turn my dreams into reality.

 

Determined to gain financial independence, I took on the challenge of working as a barista while studying. “Why wouldn’t I want to succeed?” I would laugh when explaining it to my mother. Each hour I worked brought me one step closer to a brighter future, proving that I could balance work and learning, and that my past doesn’t define my potential.

 

Through every challenge, I’ve grown stronger. My journey isn’t just about overcoming personal demons; it’s about breaking the cycle for my family. With every laugh I share and every word of encouragement I offer, I plant seeds of hope, nurturing those around me with my unwavering spirit.

 

Looking ahead, I’m filled with gratitude for where I am. I dream of opening my own café one day – a warm, welcoming space for people to gather and feel at home. The business acumen and data skills I’ve gained from Salesforce will be crucial in making that dream a reality. I’m manifesting my goals step by step, fueled by the belief that anything is possible.

 

My story is a testament to resilience and the power of hope. I refuse to be defined by my past. I stand tall and ready to embrace whatever comes next, fully aware that I am the architect of my own destiny. If I can rise above, so can you. Your story isn’t over; it’s just beginning. Hold on to your dreams and never stop believing in yourself. You have the strength to overcome anything.

From despondency to planning to buy her first home, Kirsten has turned her life around through the opportunity she has received in the Life Choices Academy. Twelve months of a coding learnership has changed Kirsten’s attitude and life style.

Kirsten (22), from Strandfontein, found herself drifting unhappily through life. “After finishing high school, I felt stuck and unhappy and was sick often. I didn’t feel like I was contributing anything to society and felt worthless”. Kirsten realised she needed to change something so she began a process of reflecting on what her passions were – design and fashion were two of her key interests and in her heart, she knew that a career in one of these fields is what she wanted to pursue.

“One day my mom came home from church with a pamphlet advertising a coding course run by Salesian Life Choices. It was the last day for submission and she encouraged me to apply. I felt excited when I read the pamphlet, so I applied. I had not considered coding before but one thing I enjoyed was being able to help people with their technical problems, at times I even felt like a ‘technical genius’.”

Two weeks after applying, Kirsten received her life-changing call. “I was invited for a boot camp, where we learnt more about what Life Choices Academy offered and I completed a few online assessments to see if I met the miniimum criteria for the course”.

“I passed the necessary coding modules and I was accepted into the full time 12 months coding learnership. It meant that I needed my parents help so they agreed to sponsor my transport for the duration of the course. I knew then my life was about to change and I couldn’t wait”.

Life Choices Academy offers young people that have finished high school the possibility of gaining hard skills that allow them to enter the workplace. It combines a 6-months full-time course that leads to a 6-months paid internship opportunity. In that time, aside from the hard skills taught in coding, students were also exposed to self-development trainings.

“The Life Skills component was incredible. Immediately I could feel myself changing inside and began learning that if you are unhappy in a situation, you have the inner power to change it. A big revelation for me was the concept of turning walls (self limiting thinking) into doors (creating opportunities).”

Kirsten realised that her biggest wall in life was a fear of making the wrong career choices. “I didn’t want to reach the age of 30, still doing the same thing and still being as unhappy as I was. Life Choices helped me to be aware of this fear and assisted me in making changes to turn this fear into doors of possibility.”

In addition to life skills, students are also offered access to a Life Choices therapist to help deal with more personal issues on a one to one basis. “I was nervous at first as I didn’t think I had anything to talk about but as soon as I sat down, it was like I already knew the therapist. She helped me realise what was holding me back and she was always there to listen to me. Through my sessions, I realised I was seeking love from others but actually I could find self-love and self-confidence within myself. This, coupled with the other things we were taught in the course made me more independent, more in control of my own success.”

The Life Choices Academy also incorporates professional development and Design Thinking Skills, Kirsten highlighted the effect that the Pomodoro Technique had on her. “Coding is intense, and it is easy to get caught up in a problem for hours and not make much progress anywhere. The Pomodoro Technique taught us to work intently for half an hour and then take a 5-minute break. This has been such an important skill for me to master and has served me well in my internship. There have been many times when I’m stuck on a problem but, after taking a break, the solution comes quite quickly and you’re back on track.”

In order to prepare students for the working environment, an integral part of the course is to teach problem-solving techniques and empower learners to be self taught. “There was always a strict process involved when you were stuck. First, try your best, then do a google search, then ask your peer (giving them further opportunity to learn and grow). If your peer cannot help you only then do you approach your coach and if it really cannot be solved then we would go to the lecturer. By following these steps, again and again, it helped me take more responsibility for my own learning.”

Kirsten excelled in the course and graduated in January this year, successfully gaining a paid internship at BNRY for 6 months. “On my first day, I was excited to be using what I learnt at Life Choices. With my JavaScript skills, I felt ready to tackle whatever came my way only to find out that the company used other libraries or frameworks. I quickly realised that what we had learned was just a stepping stone or spark into a much bigger world I was yet to learn about.” Kirsten has immersed herself in learning these new technical languages which have substantially added to her growing skill set.

During the internship, Kirsten has been focused and committed. “A big lesson for me during my internship was learning to ask the more experienced team members for guidance and technical support when I was stuck. I wanted to prove myself which stopped me from asking for help, but after some coaching from my mentor, I realised I needed to be honest when I didn’t know something and just ask. Now, when I have a problem and I have exhausted all my options, I know I can ask and help will be there.”

“This experience has developed my self-confidence even more and developed my ability to work in a team. I am learning new things every day which keeps me motivated and I feel part of a large network and community of people.”

Kirsten expressed her gratitude at being on a trajectory which will offer continuous learning and new career opportunities and is looking forward to sharing her learning by paying it forward. She has decided to become a mentor to new students on the Coding course at Life Choices on Saturday mornings. “Life Choices has added huge value to my life – it has changed my life. I tell everyone about it, and whenever I received a Life Choices Academy recruitment brochure, I what’s app it to all my friends and post it at the corner shops and around my local area. One of my best friends is doing the course now!”

Whilst sharing her story Kirsten was bubbling with enthusiasm and confidence, and she is in the process of repaying her parents which makes her feel good about herself. Her efforts have paid off resulting in Kirsten being offered an extension on her internship into a 3-month probation period, where she will have the opportunity to prove herself on various projects with the possibility of an offer of a permanent job.

“It feels ‘amazing’ to be financially independent and going to work is something I am excited about each day. I am thrilled about my future, I want to move closer to the city and for the first time this feels like a real possibility. I am considering buying a house and it is a goal I know I can now achieve.”

Evan Christians (22) tells us about his upbringing and how Life Choices Academy brought perspective into his life again.

“Most of my life was spent growing up in Lotus River. It’s a troubled community with lots of challenges most specifically crime and drugs which are big problems there. Like many poor neighbourhoods, we had a lot to deal with. Loads of kids don’t finish school so unemployment is high which causes a big gangster culture and intensifies the crime levels. This created a dark underlying community. I feel fortunate that the section I grew up in was tight-knit with people looking out for each other, neighbourhood support and generally children felt protected.

Fortunately, when I was ready to go to high school, my Mom had a good job. She worked for UCT and was able to send me to a school in a more affluent community. I felt more privileged than my friends from Lotus River. My first high school in the leafy suburbs was largely attended by coloured learners, so it was not a problem adjusting to this affluent school.

However, in Grade 11, I moved to a new school because I was not doing well and I failed the year. Not sure what happened that year, I guess I lost motivation. I moved from Groote Schuur to Camps Bay High to repeat Grade 11. Travel wasn’t a problem as my uncle taught at Camps Bay primary and I moved to live with him and his family in Mowbray during the week. Weekends I went home to my family. It was really nice living between 2 families – I grew a lot, adjusting to a totally new household and the times I spent back with my family felt a lot more precious. The only challenge at that time was that in Camps Bay High was the first time I became aware of the
cultural diversity and the socio-economic divide in South Africa. At the beginning I was treated differently because of my race. I wasn’t used to racism, having grown up in post-Apartheid South Africa and in predominantly coloured schools where I was the ‘norm’. In the beginning it was tough but then I got used to it.

I began realising that I had a real aptitude for math and science and I wanted to dive deeper into the science of mathematics. This drew me to apply to study Actuarial Science at UCT. I started 1st year on this course but pretty soon I felt I hadn’t made the right choice – I found it a bleak field of study. Once I’d completed 1st year I made a choice to give up my studies. With this realisation, I felt compromised because my studies had cost my parents a lot of money. I felt as though everything I had worked for had been in vain and that I had thrown away an opportunity. The initial impact of this was that I was left feeling depressed, wondering if I was just going to be another unemployed statistic in the Cape Flats.

Sometime during my apathy and depression and through the advice of a family friend, I applied to do a course at the Life Choices Academy. It honestly was a scary time for me. I didn’t want to make another mistake but I didn’t have many other choices. Neither did I have any motivation or direction. It was a pretty horrible time for me as I didn’t want to be at home and be a burden on my family.

I was accepted to do the coding course and remember that my negative state of mind took away my desire to engage with the other learners. Fortunately for me, the curriculum included professional and personal development, which forced me out of my comfort zone.

Looking back I can see that when I joined the Academy I must have shown up as pretty arrogant knowing that I had had better opportunities in high school than most of the peers in my coding class. Getting to know my peers and working on projects together was very humbling for me. It got me to appreciate differences, diversity and value opinions from others.

One of the activities we had to participate in each week was “Thinking Pairs.” I felt like I was crossing my own boundaries during this time, I was breaking out of my shell by being heard and having to express myself in a safe space. I got to realise that I have given myself too little credit in the past for what I had achieved. Being heard in thinking pairs started to give me a sense of my value and worth. I’ve become open to speaking to others, and to listening out for other people’s stories. This has been valuable during my internship as it has translated into being able to open discussions and hear from my colleagues about their challenges and ideas on projects.

The personal development had me look inward. Being exposed to the various life skills at the Academy got me to expand my worldview and my limited thinking.

During the course, we were also expected to perform in many different scenarios like working alone, working in a team, creating a product in a team. A task we were given to achieve was to work in a Design Thinking team to create a product which we had to design, produce and showcase to our class. Our team designed a prototype on a virtual learning centre which had lots of interactive opportunities like animation, podcasts etc. Our objective was to make it accessible to various learning styles. This process enforced a collective thinking space where we could draw on the life skills we had learnt so far. Having to present our design with my team, to our peers, gave us a sense of achievement, whilst we were also inspired by what the other coders had created.

Whilst on the six-month coding course we were offered counselling which is where I identified a sense of arrogance and where I learnt to be more accepting of others rather than being
judgemental. It helped me to not be afraid of what I don’t know. I got to unlearn what I thought was right and to open my world view.

Having gone to a privileged high school, I was used to talking in front of the class or the school. These skills were expanded on during the presentation skills training we had on the course. I learnt to focus on engaging with the audience whilst being less aware of myself in the process. It was less about me, and more about my audience. It gave me the confidence to be myself during my interview which I believe played a big role in me landing my internship.

After the first six-months I was offered an internship. Within the first 3 months, the feedback from my manager was how pleased she was in how I had integrated into the team and that they could see the value I was bringing to the business. They wanted me on board and wanted to develop me as a programmer resulting in me being offered a full time position as a junior web developer in the middle of my internship.

Something that was very valuable during my integration into the company was applying the “learning how to learn” skill we had done during the coding course. It taught us the importance of taking breaks to ensure productivity. It also taught us how to be open to ask for help instead of isolating ourselves when we are feeling unsure of how to do something, which can become counterproductive. I got to accept that I am not a burden because I ask questions. Conversely, asking questions helped to develop and integrate me into the team.

I’ve recently been contemplating what my next career step is and how to grow from what I’ve already learnt. I have a yearning to travel internationally and earn dual citizenship whilst also exposing myself to cutting edge technology. A thought that I am keeping in mind is to one day consult or own my own company but for the foreseeable future I want to travel and gain as much exposure and experience as I can.

On another level, I want to encourage South African youth in poorer areas to be humble and be prepared to start somewhere, even if it isn’t what they feel they deserve. We all have a beginning point. It’s from this place that we grow and educate ourselves. Being in a lesser position is not dishonourable but not moving out of that position because you feel the world owes you, or that you are entitled, is the very attitude which will hold you back. Take responsibility for your own story. Make it happen.

{In closing} I am grateful for the work Life Choices is doing in the communities – they are a powerful organisation. The programmes are impactful and has been a life changing experience for me, opening up my future. My coding journey has had a massive impact on my life.